Just Chantelle's Blog

Over the past few years I have met a lot of “battered men”.  These men have been in relationships where the girlfriend/fiancé/wife abandoned them.  This is starting to be common with men whereas the women used to be the battered ones… Some of the women had very good cause probably but where does it leave the man?  He is now damaged goods trying to functions.

Gent #1 — Nice looking, family oriented, flirt

This man married a woman that he shouldn’t have (in my opinion).  He married her because he thought he was ready cause his boys were married.  WRONG!! Never allow pressure to make you make a vow that you aren’t ready to keep.  The bible says it is better to not make a vow than to make one and break it.  This gentleman stayed in his marriage for years but they didn’t really seem to be married because both of the individuals were always messing around.  WTH!!! Being the man he was brought up to be, he tried to keep his marriage and not get a divorce.  Well, that didn’t work too well in his favor.  He one day came home to an empty apartment.  Wife packed while he was at work.  Hmm… Damaged goods….

Gent #2 — Nice looking, no kids, provider

This brother married a woman who, with what I could gather, wasn’t ready to let her man be her man.  He worked hard every day, paid the mortgage, took care of her child and what happens? She decides she don’t want the relationship, don’t want to help around the house (paying few bills) and wants to keep Ray Ray in the pocket (baby daddy).  So she decides to leave the house but not the marriage… Where they do that at? Dang… Damaged goods…

Gent #3 — Nice looking, kids, provider

This brother is in a committed relationship.  He takes care of the house and she don’t have to work because he’s helping to pay her way through school.  He’s taking care of her, her kid and her family member.  All he wants is to make it official.  Setting up house and preparing for the future seems great until… One day sister girl don’t want to make whoopee no more…OMG… She says she’s stressed.  Brother does the honorable thing of not pressuring her because he is committed to the relationship… One month, two months, one year later… Still no cookies and he’s not sleeping in the same room nor is he cheating on her!!! She feels he’s cheating and no longer want the relationship… What??? Huh??? NO TRUST. He’s hurt, he’s invested so much in this relationship… Damaged goods… dang…

Each of these men have the same result…. Their woman abandoned them and they are back on the market… Now its up to us “Independent” single women who have just been waiting for a man with some of these characteristics to come along… Well, they come along but they are DAMAGED now.  Now we have to work on building up trust, esteem and confidence that we are not their ex.  We are on our Ps and Qs making sure we don’t overdo it and all the while in the back of our minds wondering if this bamma gonna try to do me like he did her.  He’s DAMAGED and it takes the good Lord above to work on him… See, the woman (his ex) is gone but she got papers on him… Even though the relationship is over, she still holds papers… Why??? Why hold on to him when you didn’t want him?  You treated him like dirt so shake the dust and leave him alone. You scared that someone is going to enjoy your “trash”… Hmmm…

I like this song… I dont know why 😉